Resolving Conflicts and Dealing with Sin in the Assembly
The apostle Paul makes a critically important request of the Body of Messiah in Ephesians 4:1-3. The Scriptures use the word “beseech” with the Greek meaning “exhort or encourage” which is much stronger language than just an ordinary, casual request. Yahweh desires His saints to take this exhortation with complete seriousness because in the final sense, whether we obey this injunction by Paul determines whether or not we participate in the First Resurrection and reign and rule with Messiah in the Millennial Kingdom.
Ephesians 4:1 I, therefore, the prisoner of Yahweh, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, 2 with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love, 3 endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (NKJ)
The highlighted concepts in this passage — lowliness/gentleness (humility), longsuffering/bearing (forgiveness), love (LOVE!), and unity/peace — will form the framework for our discussion of how brethren are to treat each other. We will also touch on proper speech which expresses all of these qualities, either more or less, depending on each believer’s skill at loving language.
Finally and to conclude, Yahweh’s Word will guide us in His procedures for resolving conflicts and dealing with sin in the assembly.
No matter how great or righteous each believer thinks he is personally, it is the health of the assembly of Messiah and how we treat our brethren that will ultimately determine our final destiny. Everything the Scriptures say about “enduring” and being “faithful” to the end depends on our obedience to Paul’s exhortation above. In the final analysis saints clinch their positions in the next age by their conduct in this age — that is, loving/obeying Yahweh and loving their neighbors as themselves, especially their brethren in the faith.
Let’s quickly review how saints should treat one another, in order to reduce conflicts and sin in the first place. For more depth on this, please read “The Body of Messiah.”. It makes sense that if we treat our brothers and sisters with humility, forgiveness, love, unity, and peace, conflict and sin in the assembly would be reduced significantly.
The Scriptures have much to say about how the brethren should treat each other. In fact, the Greek word for “one another” appears fully 50 times! This alone should underscore the importance of relationships in and among the Body of believers.
First of all, saints must be humble toward one another, not being proud or “puffed up.” Just as Messiah came as a humble servant, saints must also humbly serve each other.
1 Peter 5:5 Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for Yahweh resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.
Galatians 5:26 Let us not be desirous of vain glory (“self-conceited”), provoking one another, envying one another.
Secondly, to have peace in the assembly and to avoid conflict, believers must forgive one another. Forgive, forgive, and forgive again, seventy- times- seven, all the little idiosyncrasies which are not willful, deliberate sin on the part of other believers.
Ephesians 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as Yahweh for Messiah’s sake hath forgiven you.
Matthew 18:21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Sovereign, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? 22 Yah’shua saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
Luke 17:3 Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. 4 And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.
James 5:9 Grudge not one against another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: behold, the judge standeth before the door.
Next, believers in the Body of Messiah must love one another! We know Yahweh’s two greatest commandments involve love and this is reflected in the multitude of Scriptures regarding loving the brethren. A Scriptural way to look at loving one another is to put others first and treat others as you would want to be treated (Matthew 7:12 and Luke 6:31).
John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
1 John 3:11 For this is the message that ye heard from the beginning, that we should love one another.
1 John 3:23 And this is his commandment, That we should believe on the name of his Son YahwehShua Messiah, and love one another, as he gave us commandment.
1 John 4:7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of Yahweh; and every one that loveth is born of Yahweh, and knoweth Yahweh. 8 He that loveth not knoweth not Yahweh; for Yahweh is love.
2 John 1:5 And now I beseech thee, lady, not as though I wrote a new commandment unto thee, but that which we had from the beginning, that we love one another.
1 Peter 1:22 Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently:
1 Peter 4:8 And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
1 Thessalonians 4:9 But as touching brotherly love ye need not that I write unto you: for ye yourselves are taught of Yahweh to love one another.
Galatians 5:13 For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.
John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.
John 15:17 These things I command you, that ye love one another.
Romans 12:10 Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another;
Romans 13:8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.
And in the “Love Passage” of 1 Corinthians 13, Paul clearly explains how to love one another.
1 Corinthians 13:4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails. (NKJ)
Lastly, Yahweh commands that there be only unity and peace in the Body of Messiah.
Mark 9:50 Salt is good: but if the salt have lost his saltness, wherewith will ye season it? Have salt in yourselves, and have peace one with another.
1 Thessalonians 5:13 And to esteem them very highly in love for their work’s sake. And be at peace among yourselves
Matthew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of Yahweh.
Hebrews 12:14 Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see Yahweh:
Psalm 34:14 Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it.
Romans 12:17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. 18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.
Psalm 133:1 Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!
And believers are to communicate their humility, forgiveness, love, and unity/peace with each other through careful, Holy Spirit-directed speech. We must take a crash course from James, quickly learning his lesson about the tongue being a fire. As our mothers used to say, if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
1 Peters 3:8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: 9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
Leviticus 19:11 Ye shall not steal, neither deal falsely, neither lie one to another.
Colossians 3:9 Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds;
1 Peter 3:10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: 11 Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.
Believers must use proper speech to encourage and build up one another!
Hebrews 3:13 But exhort one another daily, while it is called Today; lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.
Ephesians 4:29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.
1 Thessalonians 5:9 For Yahweh hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Sovereign YahwehShua Messiah, 10 Who died for us, that, whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with him. 11 Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do
One way believers fail at humility, forgiveness, love, unity, and peace is when they are full of pride. The health of the Body of Messiah depends on the spiritual health of each member. It is critical, therefore, for each member to continuously check his or her own “pride-o-meter”. The Bible is replete with warnings about the dangers of pride and its connection with anger and therefore, strife and contention. If each saint can remain humble in him- or herself, conflict in the assembly will be greatly reduced!
According to Yahweh’s Word, human pride can be controlled by the believer keeping his friendship with Yahweh instead of the world and remaining spiritual rather than carnal. The Apostle John contrasts love of the world with doing the will of Yahweh and pinpoints three human inclinations which lead to sin — the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life (1 John 2:15-17). Yahweh also calls these three areas man’s “carnality.”
The essential point is that if each saint will control his or her own pride and remain humble, peace in the assembly will usually follow. It is certain that most congregational conflicts and splits are rooted in self-pride. Here are just a few verses linking pride, anger, and conflict.
Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall. 19 Better to be of a humble spirit with the lowly, Than to divide the spoil with the proud. (NKJ)
Proverb 21:24 A proud and haughty man — “Scoffer” is his name; He acts with arrogant pride. (NKJ)
1 Timothy 6:3 If any man teach otherwise, and consent not to wholesome words, even the words of our Sovereign YahwehShua Messiah, and to the doctrine which is according to righteousness; 4 He is proud, knowing nothing, but doting about questions and strifes of words, whereof cometh envy, strife, railings, evil surmisings,
So how should the assembly resolve conflicts and sin? First, let us review verses about how saints should resolve conflicts. Yahweh’s Word offers a clear procedure for handling conflicts between believers. First of all, Yahweh states that He does not welcome worshipers who are at odds with a brother. He commands them to first reconcile with their brother and then they may come to His altar.
Matthew 5:23 Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought (i.e. something) against thee; 24 Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.
As previously mentioned, Yahweh commands unity/peace, that is, no division in the Body of Messiah. Therefore it is imperative that a saint try his best to reconcile with his brother with much humility, forgiveness, and love.
1 Corinthians 1:10 Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Sovereign YahwehShua Messiah, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.
1 Corinthians 12:25 That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another. 26 And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it.
2 Corinthians 13:11 Finally, brethren, farewell. Be perfect, be of good comfort, be of one mind, live in peace; and the Elohim of love and peace shall be with you.
A simple solution to solving some conflicts in the assembly is by casting lots. For more information on casting lots please read “Casting Lots.
The primary reason for casting lots was to render an impartial, unbiased decision by Yahweh on important matters that could not be agreed upon. Once the lots were cast, no one could argue that the decision was the result of human intervention like nepotism, favoritism, personal agenda and so on.
There is nothing in the Scriptures prohibiting saints from using this practice of casting lots. In fact, Yahweh’s inclusion of two passages in Proverbs regarding casting lots confirms that this practice can be used.
Proverbs 16:33 The lot is cast into the lap, But its every decision is from Yahweh. (NKJ)
Proverbs 18:18 Casting lots causes contentions to cease, And keeps the mighty apart. (NKJ)
But if saints decide to use this practice of casting lots to decide an important matter they must believe Proverbs 16:33 that the outcome is Yahweh’s will.
Believers need to be careful what matters are determined by casting lots. Remember, saints have the Holy Spirit to lead us into all truth and righteousness and Yahweh’s Word to be a lamp unto our feet. Therefore for determining doctrine or future prophecy, casting lots should not be used. Yahweh wants us to be mature, sensitive to His Holy Spirit and know His Word so we will not seek him in aberrant ways. Scriptures provide a guide to when casting lots should be used. Again, please read “Casting Lots” for more information.
Conflict in the assembly may be tied to a brother or sister who is sinning. So how should the assembly deal with sin? The following Scriptures give us a clear understanding of how to approach a brother or sister who is sinning.
- First, a saint must go and tell the other believer his sin between them alone.
- If he will not listen, then that saint needs to take one or two brothers or sisters with him to confront the sinning saint.
- If that saint does not repent of his sin, then the issue of this sinning saint needs to go before the whole assembly of Messiah.
Confronting the sinning saint should be done carefully, in love, with the goal of restoration. The focus of the discussion should be on the sin, not the person.
Matthew 18:15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the assembly: but if he neglect to hear the assembly, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.
If that sinning saint neglects to hear the assembly and turn from his wicked ways, he needs to be removed from the assembly. Yahweh is clear that He does not want brothers and sisters in Messiah keeping company with a willful sinner.
Titus 3:9 But avoid foolish questions, and genealogies, and contentions, and strivings about the law; for they are unprofitable and vain. 10 A man that is an heretick (i.e. a divisive man) after the first and second admonition reject; 11 Knowing that he that is such is subverted, and sinneth, being condemned of himself.
2 Thessalonians 3:1 Finally, brethren, pray for us, that the word of Yahweh may have free course, and be glorified, even as it is with you: 2 And that we may be delivered from unreasonable and wicked men: for all men have not faith….
6 Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our Sovereign YahwehShua Messiah, that ye withdraw yourselves from every brother that walketh disorderly, and not after the tradition which he received of us….14 And if any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man, and have no company with him, that he may be ashamed. 15 Yet count him not as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother.
1 Corinthians 5:9 I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators: 10 Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world. 11 But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat……..Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
1 Timothy 6:3 If any man teach otherwise, and consent not to wholesome words, even the words of our Sovereign YahwehShua Messiah, and to the doctrine which is according to righteousness; 4 He is proud, knowing nothing, but doting about questions and strifes of words, whereof cometh envy, strife, railings, evil surmisings, 5 Perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds, and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain is righteousness: from such withdraw thyself.
Romans 16:17 Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.
We should not keep company with anyone who continuously disobeys the word of Yahweh and transgresses the Doctrine of Messiah. This may even mean removing oneself from an assembly that does not follow love and the commandments of YahwehShua. And we should never allow someone in our home who tramples the Word of Yahweh.
2 John 9 Whosoever transgresseth, and abideth not in the doctrine of Messiah, hath not Yahweh. He that abideth in the doctrine of Messiah, he hath both the Father and the Son. 10 If there come any unto you, and bring not this doctrine, receive him not into your house, neither bid him Yahweh speed: 11 For he that biddeth him Yahweh speed is partaker of his evil deeds.
It is also important that we reach out to a sinning brother or sister and try our best to turn them from their sinning ways. We will be blessed if we pull a sinning saint from the (Lake of) fire. We should never turn our heads the other way from obvious sin by a fellow saint and allow him to go down a path of destruction.
James 5:19 Brethren, if any of you do err from the truth, and one convert him; 20 Let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.
Jude 21 Keep yourselves in the love of Yahweh, looking for the mercy of our Sovereign YahwehShua Messiah unto eternal life. 22 And of some have compassion, making a difference: 23 And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.
Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. 2 Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Messiah.
All conflicts and sin must be handled by the assembly, not through lawyers who are unbelievers and a court system that is against Yahweh! It is interesting to note in the following verse that we, as the body of Messiah, will judge and rule over the world and angels during Messiah’s 1,000 year reign. Selah (i.e. think about it). If saints will judge and rule over the world and angels, surely we can judge over disputes in the body!
1 Corinthians 6:1 Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints? 2 Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters? 3 Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life? 4 If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the assembly. 5 I speak to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you? no, not one that shall be able to judge between his brethren? 6 But brother goeth to law with brother, and that before the unbelievers.
Yes, we will judge and rule over the world and angels, but we must also realize we are still carnal. And until this corruptible puts on incorruption, saints will continue to sin. Yahweh has asked us to judge others when they are sinning. But before we judge others, we must also examine ourselves first. We must turn away from our sins before we confront a sinning brother or sister, especially if our sin is the same as theirs!
Matthew 7:1 Judge not, that ye be not judged. 2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. 3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? 4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? 5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.
Romans 2:1 Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things. 2 But we are sure that the judgment of Yahweh is according to truth against them which commit such things. 3 And thinkest thou this, O man, that judgest them which do such things, and doest the same, that thou shalt escape the judgment of Yahweh?
Yahweh wants His saints to conduct themselves with humility, forgiveness, love, unity, and peace. If saints practice these virtues, conflict and sin in the assembly will be reduced substantially and the Body of Messiah will be strengthened.
Yahweh wants a unified and strong Body of Messiah. So if there are disputes among the brethren, Scriptures are clear that trying to reconcile with a brother or sister in the faith is more important than coming to Yahweh’s alter.
Lastly, Yahweh wants His saints to immediately deal with sin in the assembly and has a several step process to deal with a sinning saint. This several step process culminates with clear instructions to not have company with that sinning saint if he or she does not repent.
We conclude this article with an amazing passage from the apostle Paul on how the Elect of Yahweh must act towards one another.
Colossians 3:12 Therefore, as the elect of Yahweh, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Messiah forgave you, so you also must do. 14 But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection.
HalleluYah
(6/15a)